One down, many to go (I hope)
The first softball tourney of the year has came and went. I am currently stiff and sore but that's to be expected since I caught.
There were both upsides and downsides to the tournament. The two major upsides were that for one, we didn't have to pay as Twin 1 put the team together. The other was that I can still hit, even after a four month layoff.
Yes I know what you're thinking, did he just really say he played softball, in February?
Yes I did. I was more pumped up about it than I let on, even if it was still technically winter. The downside was that we had to play with Twin 1 and Twin 2. Twin 2 played first, while Twin 1 pitched. By the end of the tourney I wanted to strangle Twin 1 as he just doesn't get it. This is slow pitch softball we're talking about. There is supposed to be some arch, (depending on the governing bodies on the tourney anywhere from 3-12 feet of arch from point of release) but Twin 1 doesn't get it. Both Timmy and I have pitched and we understand that you need to bring some arch in so that the hitters just can't have their way with the pitch.
But Twin 1 put the team together, so he could pitch. Too bad he pitches serve it up pitching.
The other thing was that our infield was sketchy at best. Casey isn't a shortstop. He's a better outfielder than infielder. Granted he's quick, but he doesn't stay down enough to make plays on grounders.
I should have known we were in trouble when in the first game we came out and scored 26 runs but we lost 30-26. In one inning, the other team scored 14 because we were like clowns out there. Thanks to our heads being up our asses, they put the game away in two innings, one with 9 runs, and the previous inning.
The other thing with Twin 1 and Twin 2. They can't hit. I mean they flat suck. It's a miracle if they get a hit. We had a pretty solid lineup, except they were batting 9 and 10 hole. I was following them at 11. That sucked since the speed of our lineup was up behind me. In all honesty, I should have been hitting 7 or 8 hole to move the batters around in front of me.
Personally, I went 6-9 with a couple of SACs that scored runs. I'll take .667 any day of the week. I'm just glad that I'm playing spring ball without the Twins. Twin 2 is probably a little bit of a better hitter than Twin 1, but his glove work isn't exactly stellar.
With the spring team, Timmy will be pitching, and I'll be catching. That works because I can set up and Tim can hit wherever I tell him to pitch to. That will be fun. Plus, I can direct traffic (move the OF around and such) from behind the plate.
I'll keep you posted.
An opportunity...kind of.
So our normal sports guy and former owner of the paper's wife passed away last night. The duty falls on me to make sure I can cover sports.
That's fine.
I'm a sportswriter at heart, the only thing is that somehow I feel cheated because I've expanded my horizons so much in the last 9 months. I went to the games on Tuesday nights, which was just easy (save for the whole picture taking thing) and just like falling off a log. I'm just not sure that this is the way I wanted the opportunity to present itself.
I know I can do it, but the setting just isn't what I wanted it to be.
To vent or not to vent.
Since I am a journalist by choice, ability and education, I don't get to make rebuttals towards letters to the editor written to my employer, the local newspaper.
Going through my normal monday routine, I was at the paper doing my normal proofreading duties when I ran across the letters to the editor page. Usually in our small conservative hometown of 4000, we get one or two letters dealing with what the writer deems as religious issues or something of that nature. Of the three that were slated to be run, two jumped out at me.
The first was a rebuttal letter to a previous letter. The letter that they were rebutting, was criticizing the ACLU for not wanting to support Boy Scout troops, either near or on military installations. Fine and dandy that someone wanted to make a point about it. I'm all about people expression their opinions.
What got to me is how the people who wrote the rebuttal letter, compared the Boy Scout troops across the country to Hitler and the Communists. Excuse me??? How does one arrive at that conclusion? Since when have the Boy Scouts and all that they stand for, remind people of a swastika and all that it stands/stood for? According to the letter, by letting children be in Scouts only encourages military service, in the same way in which Hitler used patriotic clubs to swell his military ranks. Last time I checked, this was the United States of America. People have a choice to do what they want. Boy Scouts is not a recruitment tool for the military. I know plenty of people who never were involved in scouts who were lifers in the military. I know Scouts who never went into the military. I was never in Scouts. Don't come at me firing away with some quote of some president of some stupid organization saying that it parallels 1930s Germany. That's just ignorant.
Once communism was brought up, the letter quickly said that we as Americans need the seperation of Church and State because once the state tells you what Church to go to, that means you've become Communist. I'm not even going to go near that issue. I was more shocked that they decided to compare Boy Scouts to Communists and Nazis.
I think it had to be like the Red Scare of the 1950's. People, it's 2005. Get a grip.
The second letter had to do with the cancellation of a high school dance. I was in high school back 13 years ago when they actually canceled a dance because at least 50% of the patrons were intoxicated. That is something understandable because the drinking paranoia was in full force. In fact, partying had become stereotypical of the "in-crowd."
Fast forward to 2005. This dance was canceled because as the author told it, "dancing leads to sex." Oh dear God. We're in the movie "Footloose." Yes, I know we're in a small fairly conservative community in the middle of Kansas, but canceling a dance because supposedly it leads to sex? Come on. I want to know who the Bible beating administrator was who had the insight that because of one high school dance, all the kids were out having unprotected sex.
Here's the kicker. Instead of a dance, they are havine a "Couples Night." Hmmm, let's check on that one. Now instead of promoting an activity that includes all the willing high school population, the organizers are promoting an activity that encourages people to show up in couples? Good move there Reverend Shaw Moore. Could "Couples Night" even produce a more condusive environment that could lead to wild fornication of teenagers? Oh I think that it could. The potential is there. What's to not stop these kids from thinking 'Wow, this couples night will be lame. Maybe instead we should go watch a movie over at so-and-so's house since their parents aren't home.' A dark room, high school kids and hormones running wild without supervision? Orgy anyone? Good call by the administration on that one, because the school can't supervise people in their own homes, but they can chaperone a dance.
What about my 13 year old sister and her first two middle school dances? Now that they are dancing, is my sister out having sex because she was dancing? Um no she's not. Why is it different with a 13-year old 7th grader? Because they don't know? That's total horsecrap. They know. They know more than they let on.
I swear I feel like I have flashed back to 1958. What's next? Book Burning? Banning of Rock and Roll?
I said it once and I'll say it again.
Dear God people, get a grip.
Master of the Flying Guillotine
Ever see a movie that was so awful that you couldn't pull your eyes away from it?
And I'm not talking just a one time where you see part of it and say "That's really bad." I'm talking about the type of movie that you see and say "Wow. That's really awful. That could be one of the worst movies I've ever seen."
But it doesn't stop there. It's kind of like a car accident involving circus freaks and monkeys. You just can't pull your eyes away from it.
So you determine it's possible one of the worst pieces of cinematic crap ever made. However, it happens to be on one of the movie channels again, so like a moth to a bright light you turn it on for just pure entertainment purposes.
The movie I'm talking about is "Master of the Flying Guillotine." The name itself should lend itself to its credibility of how truly awful it is. It is, in fact, a horribley dubbed kung-fu fighting movie involving two principle characters, the One-Armed Boxer and the Blind Man.
The One-Armed Boxer killed two of the Blind Man's students and now the Blind Man is out for revenge. There were some type of internationl politics involved as the OAB is some type of revolutionary against the current dynasty. I didn't get the gist of it as the movie seemed to be set in the late 1800's. There could have even been a political message involved but it was lost amidst the horrendous dubbing of English. Anyways, the Blind Man wields the most dangerous weapon known to martial artists, the Flying Guillotine.
Yes, sports fans, this is a device that is attached to a chain and looks like a large red mushroom. The Flying Guillotine is thrown at a person's head. When the mushroom part makes contact with the intended target's head, a mesh like helmet drops from the mushroom part, encasing the target's head. Concealed within this helmet are razor blade and with a swift flick of the wrist, the Flying Guillotine slice the head clean off. The weapon has a sound effect much like that of a gunshot ringing out from a Clint Eastwood spaghetti western, complete with the Old West Echo. Truly spine tingling.
The Blind man himself is the bad guy of the movie, complete with Bad Guy theme music. Wherever he goes, his theme music accompanies him. It's heavy duty, almost cheesey 70's industrial techno letting you know that the character on screen in fact is the Baddest of the Bad Guys.
The OAB lost his arm somehow. Whether he was the victim of a tragic farming accident or lost it in a fight with the 7 men he killed with one blow, the reason wasn't specified. Like a fighting video game, when the time is right, the OAB can call on his spirit to deliver the one blow that can kill his opponent, (usually a blow to the chest.)
I'm not going to get into the concepts of the tournament, or the fact that the Blind man can move his head all the way around to listen for his opponent. Yes it's truly that bad.
This is the type of movie that you watch and then you call your friends to tell them to come over to see this so they can believe it for themselves. Then all of your friends bask in the agony that is this film. What films fall into this category?
Oh yeah, it is and it has a sequel.
Cruise control
So, our golf pro had been bugging me to finally make it over to the Wednesday night poker game. Tonight was the first Wednesday that I didn't have something going on, so my pops and I joined this regular crew for an evening of Texas Hold 'Em. A 30 dollar buy-in got me my chips and away I went along with the other 18 players.
I won the first hand of the evening at my table. A couple of hours later, I sat on the chip lead at that table when they finally had dropped enough people to combine the three tables into two.
Damn the move.
From that point on, I didn't win a hand. Not one single, freaking hand. I didn't even get hands to play. I just kept folding and putting in the blinds as they came to me and slowly my stack dwindled. I got lucky enough to get moved to the final table with the last 8 players, myself included.
Again, my luck was much the same. I couldn't buy a hand. I was sitting on the short stack with the last seven remaining players winning money. Fortunately one guy went all in ahead of me. I folded and another guy called. The guy that went all in got drowned on the river and I was in the money.
I was able to manage my stack enough without winning a hand to sneak into 6th place whice paid my money back plus ten bucks.
All in all, it was a good evening.
Vday?
Yes, I am single. Single and loving it, I might add. That's not to say I wouldn't mind a change in status, but I'm sure not losing sleep over it. But that brings me to today's point.
Today was Valentine's day. I'm not a bitter, lonely person who views today as the day in which single people are wretched, vile creatures. In fact, it's quite the opposite.
First of all, have you ever tried to get reservations at a restaurant for this evening? It's not overly fun. A few years back my sis, Rooskie and one of her friends all decided to be Anti-Valentine's day and go feast on Chinese food at a local restaurant. Fortunately we got there early enough to get a table. I've never seen it that packed. We probably waited a half hour to get our food. There were people stacked up in the entrance to the place. We got lucky in that we didn't have to wait to be seated.
Second of all, if you're going to see a movie on Valentine's day,.....don't. There are other forms of punishment one can inflict upon one's self. Try to get tickets to a movie without reserving them. Good luck.
Anyways, I don't view vday as a burden. Plus it's worked out in my favor when I've taken sulky girls out so that they didn't feel alone. It was pimptastic.
Thieved from Becka.
A - age you got your first kiss: 17
B - band listening to right now: Indigenous
C - crush: Good question. I'm not sure.perhaps that one girl in class or that other one's sister
D - dad’s name: Sid
E - easiest person to talk to: Becka, Carrie, Amy
F - favorite bands at the moment: Whomever catches my ear
G - gummy bears or gummy worms: Worms baby, worms.
H - hometown: Hesston
I - instruments: Scalpel, needle-nosed pliers and fishhooks
K - kids: HA! Missing a few steps there ace.
L - longest car ride ever: From Oregon back to KS the summer of 98
M - mom’s name: Kathy
N - nicknames: RJ, Rust, Rus, and others
O - one wish:To have my tutition paid for in full.
P - phobia[s]: heights and spiders. the worst would be a really tall spider when I would be up high
Q - favorite quote: “Every normal man must be tempted at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag and start slitting throats”
R - reason to smile: friends, family, fun
S - song you sang last: Voices in my head-Pat Godwin
T - time you woke up [today]: Woke up at 8, then at 9 and then 10:30. Finally drug myself out of bed at 11 ish
U - unknown fact about me:i'm highly allergic to garlic
V - vegetable you hate: cabbage
W - worst habit(s): swearing
X - x-rays you’ve had: I've never had an x-ray
Y - yummy food: Chinese, mexican, and cajun/creole
Z - zodiac sign: Aquarius
Was I shorted?
I think I was. I don't think it was intentional, but I seem to be missing five games. Maybe they're coming after all the regional/substate playoffs begin.
It's Friday, the Gateway to the Weekend. As of this point, I should probably think of planning something to do. It's too cold to go fishing (and not Amy's version of fishing either), there's nothing to hunt, supposed to rain so golf is out. Hmm..maybe I'll just go to some baketball games or something.
So my father and I spent the evening watching a basketball game last night. It was between to colleges in the NAIA, (National Assoc. of Intercollegiate Athletics or something along those lines). They're smaller four year colleges, with populations that probably range about 500-600 students or thereabouts. Anyways, one of the assistants is a buddy from high school. His coach was telling the team that if they threw the ball around too much, that they would end up killing an old person because the fans of the other school are dominated by senior citizens.
During the game the opposition's student section stood and cut off our view into the corner of the court. We jumped up and moved to center court in the midst of all these senior citizens. Good seats, but my god. I've never heard that much whining. Everytime one of the opposition's players moved their feet, they screamed for a traveling call. However, when the home team did anything, not a word was said. Someone needed to show these folks what a travel was. Anytime an opposition player touched the home team player, they called for a foul. Again, the opposition could get mugged more than what happens in a dark alley, and there wasn't a word said.
It just makes me hate ignorant fans who believe that their home team should get away with anything short of second degree murder. I had no alliences, I was just there to watch a good ball game between the opposition whom my buddy was an assistant for and the home team whom I happened to know a couple of players. But the fans consistent whining was annoying.
Oh well.
Why?
Why won't they return my calls? Was my check that big that they don't want to hand it over? Dammit man, call me back. It must be huge. Greedy bastards over at the station. Hey, I'm a broke ass college student that needs some monetary lovin.
I can't walk up stairs. As I was bounding up the stairs to go grab some lunch, my foot caught and I almost went crashing headfirst into the back door. I kind of chuckled laughing at my own stupidity, when I turned to go up the last three steps.
Of course, I tripped there too. That one almost pitched me ass over ankles into the kitchen. I swear I'm the most gifted person I know.
Anyone know where I can buy a book on walking?
Cleaning the pool, fishing or f********
So, I have a friend who was going away for the weekend to go "fishing." Last time I checked, it was February. Granted this friend is in Minnesota where they can actually go fishing through the ice. However, Ms. P. isn't going fishing alone. My rather astute guess was that the "fishing" was just a pretense for another word that begins with the letter F. I'll let you figure out exactly what I mean.
I guess she calls the act of which I speak about, "fishing." We have also come up with other names for it. One of the more creative was when a gentleman I know was talking about grilling. He was grilling steaks for his wife on a Saturday afternoon but they ended up burned because the were consumating the marriage so to speak. So they ended up with burnt steaks henceforth, "fishing" became "burning the steaks." Very creative.
But, the most creative was named by my friend Jeff W. Jeff had an answering machine back when we both attended the same school which had a message that went like this.
Female voice: "Hello?"
Male voice : "I'm here to clean the pool."
Female voice : "But, I don't have a pool."
Cheesy 70's porn music. BOWCHICKABOWWOW.
From that point on, we refferred to the act as cleaning the pool.
How do you refer to this act?
Wow.
I didn't know this didn't work. How weird. But according to my webguru, it's all fixed.
Phil saw his shadow but...
I didn't. I figure that because it's my day of birth I've got some pull. That means that I guess we'll have an early spring. Why wasn't I consulted when they whole groundhog phenomenoa happened? I am a groundhog so I should have some type of pull when it comes to the whole early forecasting shit.
Who knows?
